Is purpose essential for manliness?
Maybe…but maybe not as much as some men’s work sources suggest.
It is true that being aligned with purpose can help a man have a greater impact in life, but if purpose is not crystal clear for you, it’s not the end of the world.
Listen as AMP Course Leader Robbie Carlton and I explore the importance of purpose and offer a powerful practice to increase alignment.
The is part of a three-part AMP Essentials series. Click here to review the full series.
If you are curious and want to learn more about the AMP Intensive, click here
Special acknowledgement to Ian Blei for his expertise on the journaling practice
For purpose, for me its been like a day by day crafting of the sword by imbuing it with all of the best metals, burning it in the forging fire, and letting it sit and cool, before melting it down and re-creating it the next day. Adding on, taking off, altering, crafting.
Purpose has never been a blanket statement for me. It is something I have to intend to develop daily, and it gets stronger and becomes an even greater beacon with time.
A really good purpose that has been honed can create a very solid North Star for a man, even if it is a purpose that is chiefly felt and cannot be put into words.
Here’s a challenge I have – Maybe would like some of your thoughts on it:
I’m experiencing a life at the moment that I really feel like I need to ‘show up more’. I think what I’m feeling could be described as “I really fucking feel a deep yearning to be on purpose and I’m fucking struggling to get on-purpose and stay there”
At the same time, I’m basically spending all my time alone – and for the last 6 months, I’ve been on a pretty conscious NWD/No bullshit people diet.
I get what you’re saying with ‘wanting to meet women without having purpose’ etc, but I’m struggling with “I can’t stand the idea of having a fucking woman in my life because I want more for my life and I’m either not showing up fully for it or finding it super fucking hard to show up – and until that time, I’m not sure I’ll ever have the desire to have a woman”
BUT I still get fucking horny and just wish I had someone with me
It kind of drives me insane. I don’t want to be ‘out looking to get laid’. I want to create a kickass life for myself more than anything (and that’s hard right now). I also don’t want to ignore that it’s fucking lonely and hurts not having someone with me sometimes.
Creating a badass, inspiring life for myself (and I’m pretty clear what that would look like for me) feels so important, but at the same time it’s fucking lonely.
And even though all my friends are confused and shocked when I tell them I haven’t bothered trying to sleep with any girls this year, I actually don’t feel fucking valuable to anyone (including myself)
So I guess there are 3 things:
1. I feel clear on what I need to do, but for some reason it’s fucking hard making all that happen right now.
2. I have an active disinterest in ‘pursuing’ girls – but I still feel alone sometimes.
3. Is my ‘disinterest’ just a fucking cop-out because I’m too fucking scared of women? (I can imagine a life where I’m half on-purpose AND half enjoying my life with girls – and not struggling so much with either)
(P.S I’ve been journalling in the kind of way that you spoke about for about a year now.Almost because I felt there was no other way than journalling than to get it out on paper/in Evernote. I find it fucking great and I’ve gotten super clear on so much in my life because of it. It’s helped immensely with clarity. But life gets progressively more dissatisfying the more clear I am on the divide between who I want to be and where I am right now. )
(Goddamit sorry for the long post. I’ll try to keep things short, more digestible and clearer in future)
No one is expecting you to, dude.